Who exactly the frig is Nadine Baggott? Why does she think we might have heard of her (or give a shite)? and what the frig are pentapeptides? (if not another expensive form of Polyfilla for desperate saggy-skinned old hags).
Names of different pizza delivery menus I received through my letterbox just this week
Tops Pizza (I give this one extra marks for the surreal use of a top hat on the leaflet - although quite what this has to do with pizza, I'm not entirely sure)
Pizza Hot-4-U (Now then, who ordered the COLD pizza?)
Mamma's Pizza (Slightly predictable name, but they are actually the cheapest, at £6.99 for any size - and edible)
Pizza Romana (in Croydon? What exactly are they trying - and failing - to evoke here?)
Pizza Pizza (possibly the most imaginatively titled yet)